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Nobody writes here but me

Every so often I receive emails from strangers offering to put their content onto this website as guest authors. I always decline the offer in a courteous reply. There are good reasons why nobody writes here but me. The main one is that Nobody Writes Here But Me.

A couple of fast examples of why I prefer an independent blogging voice can be found in two hopeful co-authors from the last couple of years.

One was a socially upper-class girl that I knew growing up and who didn’t realise my common sounding name was one and the same old me.

Her name was Angela. She once came over to us on a public beach and said this was their beach and locals weren’t allowed. Angela and her tribe totally made my life shit as a teenager because I was rather small for my age and had the inglorious disease of being local (meaning poor). My parents were shift workers. Not lawyers. Her older brother used to brutally bully me for sport during school holidays.

So when I received an email from Angela offering to co-author on this website my courteous reply asked if she was the same Angela from her home town. She replied that first she gets the gig and then she might discuss personal details.

Sorry… buzzzzz. You don’t apply for the opportunity to promote yourself by co-authoring on someone’s website and assert that you’ll answer personal questions after the interview. What, am I out on the street with a tin can begging for people to write articles? Hell, no. Nobody writes here but me.

A second person that comes to mind was a guy from the film photography social media set who publishes elsewhere. He turned out to be a total arsewipe, but beyond that I’ve seen him show the demanding signs of being a prima donna with another website publisher. So I can only imagine my intellectual property difficulties with co-authors who decide to sue me as a publisher over their work at a later date. How do I remove their articles after a falling out, or their comments and other intellectual property embedded on my domain? And, as the publisher, I’m responsible for any plagiarism or defamatory statements (including the comments). So I say, fuck you potential co-authors… nobody writes here but me.

If you look around this website you’ll see that there isn’t a scrap of paid advertising. I’m not a pro-blogger. If you want to be a co-author on this website you at the very least need to ask yourself before emailing me with offers “What’s in it for this guy?”

Seriously, if you’re offering to promote your amazing intelligence at the cost of my independence, an IP complexity not currently on my lap and the potential that I’ll be lumbered with an over-pumped prima donna, then what do you think is in it for me?

The Nobody Writes Here But Me rule is in place for a reason. I’m not new to this publishing scene. I don’t mean to be rude but it takes long hard graft to build web traffic in today’s over saturated blogosphere. I should promote your brand with my bandwidth and exposure? Or are you saying you’re so famous you can drag in web traffic that I should be happy to finance?

The simple answer will always be: build and write on your own web domain. And commit. Stand by what you write. I’m not a philanthropist.

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About the Author

Steven Clark Steven Clark - the stand up guy on this site

My name is Steven Clark and I live in the Derwent Valley in Southern Tasmania. I have an MBA (Specialisation) and a Bachelor of Computing from the University of Tasmania. I'm a mazer & a yeast farmer (making beer, fruit wine and mead as by-products of continuous improvement in my farming practices). I'm a photographer, although my film cameras are currently silent. I do not tolerate idiots. I do not tolerate bigotry. I do not tolerate excuses. Let's be clear, if you sit with my enemies you my are my enemy for life.

Blogger. Thinker. Brewer. Drinker. Life partner to the amazing and incredible Megan.

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